Hisashiburi!

Holy geez, it's been forever since I posted last.

I had a lot of great ideas but things have kind of exploded here and I've been so suddenly busy that time has just flown by and I barely realized it.

I wanted to blog about growing up labeled HG, about working in the prisons, about my future in nonprofit and law, but I'm going to procrastinate on that all since I feel exhausted now and just want to post something as an update.

Lots has happened in the past almost-month. Taiko is super duper busy now, we're prepping for a couple of big things in November, and on the 14th we're doing this slew of new taiko projects, including a collaboration with Bharata Natyam. It's my favorite kind of classical Indian dance - except we actually have to DANCE it. Somehow I, unlike other taiko members, got sucked into doing it with 2-3 other girls, except I SUCK real bad and can't even follow during class. It's really discouraging but they won't let me quit! I'm really good at playing the drum part, but they're seriously making me dance and it's super frustrating. This rarely happens, but this is one of those things that I REALLY don't want to do...only I'm stuck and it sucks balls foreal.

I'd like to give a big Fuck You to this situation - to not being able to do it and just being tired. (I still love Bharata though)

Also my back is all messed up so I was kind of in a foul mood, not wanting to be at the practice tonight.

Felt like such a waste of time.

Aside from being a Debbie Downer about that one....

work has been good, Kelsey's time here was amazing and such a blast as always, I've been getting better at fue, taiko gigs have been going well, and I've been seeing someone new.

Life is good, really, I can't complain.

Melissa came to visit me, and it was great, it was so nice to see her after a whole year, and she got me thinking all about Law School, and rejuvenated my Progressivism. (sorry about the cin gum, melissa, I still feel bad about that)

All that's left to do is await the impending dilemma - Progressive politics, or financial security?

I think I'll be good, all the way up until it's time to graduate and really find a job. Public Interest would satisfy my integrity, my need to fulfill my personal political and social responsibilities, to work in social justice and be happy that way. But the pay is absolutely unreal, and after living out here on my own, I know firsthand the difficulties that come with long hours and low pay. It's really frustrating sometimes, especially when you can't afford the things you NEED in life, much less the little luxuries that help relieve everyday stress. It might seem superficial, but real talk, it's not. This a serious life consideration for me.

A private law firm would address that money problem, paying nearly twice as much in salary, but I would have to sellout in some way and to some degree at least...and honestly right now I don't know which would make me happier (or sadder). It's like this lose-lose situation I'll have to face sometime soon.

I'm excited to start the process, but like I told Mom, I guess I'll just cross that bridge when I get there. Maybe more in a later post, too.

Feeling like I'm becoming more attached to the island - picking up the speak, loving the people, appreciating the land - but I still have this unbreakable connection to home and dedication to my career plans, so little by little I guess I'm accepting that my time here will have to come to an end. i.e. I'll be ready in March to be back in LA.

We'll see where everything is in 5 and a half months or so.

2NE1

A more "real" post later, but when I grow up I wanna be them.  The swagg is irresistible. 

Fierce.

SERIOUSLY,

what. the. fuck.

This incident at the Cracker Barrel is infuriating and so ridiculous.  

I can't believe we still live in a world like this.  With people like this.  If you can even call them people.  

At least Colbert gets it.  (I really wanted to embed it, but it wouldn't work for some reason.) 

Credit to Race Wire.  

Geez Louise, this America we live in....people like Beck and Limbaugh need to just kick the bucket already.  Lily Allen has the right idea.

Oh where, oh where....

Seriously, where has the past month and a half gone??  Almost 2 months now.

It seems like just yesterday I came back from that trip with Aya, and as it is, August just came and went.  Now September too!

It just dawned on me today, as I got out of the shower, that September is almost over, and it's totally tripping me out.  Like where have I been the past 60 days!?

Almost...like my very own Rip Van Winkle experience, but way way less time.  

Mini concert at Brigham Young University this Friday, so lots (kinda) of preparations for that this week.  It's all Mormon-ed out there, so that might be interesting, performing in Kahuku and repping the fully clothed, no sugar consuming, no alcohol or drug participating, super straightedge community.  These people, as Andy says, "walk the talk."  

Lately I've had these fleeting daydreams about, instead of becoming a lawyer, moving to Japan and becoming one of a growing number of female traditional Japanese musicians.  Like doing nagauta and playing hogaku, noh, or kabuki music.  Yeah, totally unrealistic for LA loving, non-fluent, HI chillin me, but after Hogaku and fue practice today, I was totally just like wow.  I could see myself dedicating my life to playing music like this.  In a way, so much deeper than kumi daiko.

  

It's nice to trick myself into thinking I can do that every so often.  

Maybe there's a way to be a traditional Japanese music playing, practicing attorney.  

That's a good one, right?

I think I'm just real sad this all has to come to an end and I don't see how it'll continue in LA.  But home is home, and there you have it.

One chapter done at that point, the next chapter to begin.

As a subject change, can't wait to see Michael Moore's Love Story.  Just saw him on Colbert and it looks like it's something to anticipate!

Also, going tomorrow to see the Hawai'i showing of "A Song for Ourselves," the Chris Iijima film.  The Endos knew him personally!  They're seriously like local community celebs when it comes to knowing all the big activists of the 60s to the 80s.  Protests, rallies, pilgrimages, newspaper articles and all.  Amazing.  Anyway, that should be exciting.

Speaking of exciting, Kelsey coming in October!  Yay!  Makes me think about how much I'm anticipating my next big trip.  It's like SEA was just the beginning. (right Aya?? haha)

 

Life's Trampolines

Good things (and good people) come at unexpected times.

Traveling to Hilo tomorrow for a performance that I hope goes well, since it's a precursor to next week's mini-concert performance.  If I suck tomorrow, chances are I'll suck next week too.  So with enough work, I'm just crossing my fingers and hoping.

Next week will be busy, so I'll find out then if it'll be a blessing or a curse.  Work starts again, I plan on going to kendo practice a little more consistently, plus taiko as usual and then some.  

This month is going by so fast.  Once September is over, it'll be one month down and five more to go!  Aahhh!

Late night and MJ

A couple of nights later, and my previous long post seems a little harsh.  I'm aware it could've been construed as offensive to people who do work for those causes everyday of their lives for many many years, and I hope it wasn't taken as something negative that way.  I was just venting about the badgering thoughts that have been my only friend as of late, these restless several days.  But it's true, isn't it?  It's tiring.  And I think Hawai'i life has been wearing on me.  Well, I mean, just politically.

Yet another reason to yearn for LA.

I totally miss my family and friends, and as great as people are here, it's not the same.  The truth is, I've been feeling kind of alone lately.  Strange.

Had Hogaku tonight, and that was almost great, except it had to be cut short, unfortunately.  Unforeseen circumstances.

Watching Oprah now, and it's an episode where she recalls, with commentary, her very first interview (THE very first interview) with MJ back in something like 1993.  His innocence and gentleness are remarkable.  The alarm just went off in the middle of their interview.

Anyhow, he was dating Brooke Shields at the time.  So interesting.

There really was a mystery about him - the way he talks about his life, his childhood, his music, his love life, everything.  He's just very likeable, in this interview.  Though, he seems lonely.  And sad, too.  

On another note, there are some incredibly strange things happening on this computer.  It's doing weird things, like my cursor disappears, or like the other day, it started freaking out and when I shut it to make it stop, it wouldn't turn it back on.  I had to pull out the battery and restart it.

My cursor isn't showing as I type this up now.  Frustrating.

One restarted computer later, I'm back now.

Taiko will be interesting at the very least, the next few weeks - prepping for a mini concert next Friday, going to Hilo this Saturday to perform, going to Maui in a few weeks - at least there's stuff to look forward to from a performance standpoint.  Also I'm going to try and get as much fue training as I can the next 6 months, while I can.

Lots of thoughts lately about my impending future.  And after an exciting email exchange with Megatron, it's left me with a lot of thoughts about my politics, law school, and where I'll end up in say, 5 to 8 years.  Really.

Had a great few days, so hope it only gets better.  Work starts next week too, maybe the kids will brighten up my mood.

Back to Oprah and MJ.

EDIT - He just danced for Oprah and I think I had a huge orgasm.

 

Homesick.

Yeah, like one year too late.  

Hoping it'll pass.